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Life Journey Reflections » Poems: Lost Love

• Poems
  
  Lost Love

  
  

  ---

  
  Two Lonely Boys
  
  I'm sitting here, lonely
  torn and sad,
  They expect me to be
  strong and not be bad.
  
  I'm full of talk and
  brave you see,
  But later there's tears;
  That's the real me.
  
  It's not fair, they hear
  me say;
  What did I do to
  deserve today.
  
  My little fella's crying
  away over there;
  I'm saying come over
  and sit on my chair.
  
  You can trust me, my boy,
  I'll care for you
  I'll love you my child
  When you're feeling blue.
  
  G. Dawson 27/3/86
  

  ---

  
  Masks
  
  Never be mistaken by the smile on my face.
  Never be mislead by work-contentment at a pace.
  
  Beneath this all is a heart that breaks,
  And an inner man that pines for his mate.
  
  The tears they come as I sit here today,
  Spring rain gently falling on the hay
  God's strength is beautiful and helps a lot
  But I'll never deny my desires for my ...
  
  Somehow,
  Thinking of you more
  today than most.
  
  G. Dawson 31/10/86
  

  ---

  
  Desolation
  
  Desolation
  The light has gone
  How do I learn to live?
  
  Heartbreak
  The cold of night
  How can I just forgive?
  
  How do I
  Live without you
  When you're burning in my soul?
  
  How do I
  Face the endless years
  Pretending that I'm whole?
  
  

  ---

  
  Alone
  
  I'm now alone
  Yet folks are there
  I'm standing here
  But running scared
  
  I've never known
  This feeling before
  I've always felt loved
  I've always been sure
  
  I didn't even think
  How to perform
  I was just myself
  It felt the norm
  
  But now I stand
  Confused and small
  At the drop of a hat
  I feel I could bawl
  
  No longer strong self
  And warm security
  I'm out of whack
  Where is my maturity?
  
  Unquestioning, I did
  The things I'd always do
  Happily I'd let her do
  The things she had to do
  
  The world was there
  But never a threat
  Not even possession
  Like the care of a pet
  
  Then suddenly
  The trust was broken
  Oh how hard it is to see
  How all this fits in to my dimension
  What is love now, just a token?
  
  08/01/86

  ---

  
  Angry
  
  Angry? Hey, I didn't know
            Into marriage
            Full of dreams
            Days so full
            Smiles and beams
  
  Angry? It didn't show
            Alone with kids
            Feeding, bathing
            Bed and prayers
            Dad on the phone
  
  Angry? Yes
            Kids have grown
            Many moves
            Money, cows
            Jobs, it's crazy
  
  Angry? No just dead
            Talk is cheap
            But doesn't come
            He's thick as a brick
            Days are all the same
  
  Angry? I've grown accustomed
            I'll show him
            He'll care now
            What am I doing?
            I don't care
  
  Angry? I think that's gone
            It's bliss
            No cares
            Who cares
            Hey, I'm me, free
  
  Angry? Aren't I? Free?
            No I'm not
            Who is this girl?
            I don't know
            Will I let her go?
  
  Angry? Not me
  
  Graeme Dawson 19/07/86

  ---

  Fear
  
  Desolation, barrenness,
  There's simply no way out.
  Sliding deeper- no one sees me,
  No one hears me shout.
  
  Silence, loneliness,
  My mind no longer whole,
  Set a trap and finally caught
  Myself- heart, mind and soul.
  
  March 2000

  ---

  
  My Husband
  
  As I look back through the haze
  Of mixed emotions through a glaze of tears,
  This journey we have started on
  Together, hand in hand
  Has been a pathway strewn with many fears.
  
  You know,
  
  He's plucked them one by one,
  Like petals taken from a thorny rose,
  And through all our bewilderment
  When justice seemed so far,
  He kept each fallen petal- held them close.
  
  He whispered softly,
  
  Calling gently through the storm
  "Hold on to what I've promised, cling to me."
  And when the raging tempest eased
  He left a tiny gift
  Of fallen petals-
  
  Scented Potpourri.
  
  18/05/02
  

  ---

  
  Mirage
  
  Have I a voice?
  Is here a mind?
  Or am I reflection
  For your newest line
  
  Of funnies,
  Of clever
  Of great repartee
  
  To show you how good
  You are looking to me?
  
  Have I a spirit?
  A soul or a heart?
  Or am I a mirror
  So you looking smart?
  
  You show you
  How witty,
  How charming you be
  
  You show me the door
  And you smile as I leave.
  
  12/02/04
  

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